Choose As If Your Life Depends On It
I said to a client yesterday, “For the next few days I only want you to do things that make you feel better.” As simple a concept as that was to me, it was clearly confusing to her. So, she clarified, “You mean for a week, you want me to only do things that make me feel better?” “Actually, for the rest of your life, I want you to only do things that make you feel better.” On the physical plane, in my phone call I swear you could hear crickets chirping in the background while the wheels in her brain went round and round. She was honestly completely unprepared to get that bit of homework from our session. However, in my imagination, in the ether’s angels were singing and fairies were dancing at the lovely thought of doing things that...
How to be Likable
In my recent interview with Brad Tower, a Business Lobbyist, I learned some interesting things about relationship building. I have never gone back and done post game on one of my interviews before. Most of what he said was incredibly obvious, but put together and in order, it was genius. Let’s face it a lobbyist makes a living being likable. The concept of relationship capital takes on a whole new level of meaning when you are in the business of selling concepts to people for people. These simple steps aren’t revolutionary. They aren’t even new. They are however, solid gold steps to creating more relationship capital then you’ve ever had before. When you first meet someone find a way to remember their name. One easy way is to...
Affair-proof Your Relationship with Relationship Insurance
I recently read an article about employees in the workplace who were surveyed about what they wanted most from their jobs. I was surprised by the results. More employees said they wanted recognition and to be appreciated then those who stated they wanted raises or better benefits. Similarly, several months ago Oprah did a show on why men cheat, and the resounding answer was because they felt taken for granted and unappreciated. Maybe that wasn’t exactly why they cheated, but it was definitely the root of the marital dissatisfaction that made it possible. It doesn’t take rocket science to know that appreciation makes even the hardest work go by more smoothly, however, it bares some serious examination at the notion that appreciation can affair proof a...
We Need Help
Image via Wikipedia “We need to deal with it.”He’s depressed and we really need to deal with it.He’s drinking too much and we need to get help.She has real anger issues and we need to get counseling. I don’t think so. When you are in relationship and the other partner is having some sort of a serious issue, what sucks is both partners are suffering from that serious issue. Both partners feel the effects of the depression. Both partners have to deal with the results of the drinking. Both partners are trying to manage the anger. To say that “we have a problem” is 100% right on the mark. However, to say that “we need to deal with it”, well, not so much, at least not in the way you probably think. The only person you can get...
The Myth of the 50/50 Relationship
I like to think I am capable of dealing with most things. I have resource file three inches thick. I have the personal cell phone numbers of people ranging from politicians to entertainers. I know an expert in just about any field. I also think generally speaking, I am pretty emotionally stable and can weather whatever comes my way, with one exception. I have no coping mechanism for dealing with the illness, injury, or suffering of my beloved best friend Mozart the Pug. When I say no coping mechanism, I mean NONE. I came face to face with that glaring deficiency in my ability to function this week, as Mozart is sick and I am seriously unable to function well, or at all, in my world. Last night I was laying in bed, trying desperately to hold back the...
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